Lonely

Its hard to accept the fact
That you could be lonely sometimes
That having people around to talk are for the moment
They live in their own knitted world
Even if you have someone so close
People would judge you, and yes, you yourself
But, sometimes you need to feel that loneliness
And let you heal yourself
Growing up we never realized
How distance addicted we’ve become
How sometimes you can crave for
Those few people with whom you can be real you
Speak of your mind, words all true
Need of the listening ear, just hear
Don’t process, don’t understand
Just lay beside and hear
Coz I have a load of pain sometimes
Searing through my eyes
I wonder if I could tell someone
But I don’t even know how to explain it to myself
Its just a wave of despair that crashes through myself
All the wrongs and overthinking starts to grasp
And I cannot but just trip over these thoughts to myself
These feelings feel like drowning
But I know its just this moment
Next morning I will be fine , else forget
But how to live now, I don’t know yet
Looking for love out when it not feels within
I cannot force anyone to hear myself
I wonder how child grows
I still have to adapt the feelings although I am adult
Be mature and less hormonal to control it all
I wonder how my child would face
This emptiness that sometimes comes from within

Not Her cup of tea☕

She knows that she is now the reason for someone’s sleepless nights
And she accepts it, she was responsible
From very young, she always
Tried to please everyone around her
Her parents, her family, her friends
Even the uncle and aunts who you’d think
Why would they even matter
She would even go as far as to try to please a stranger
Say no more to hurt the other
She was that girl
That foolish too kind to be true girl
Who many had already taken advantage of
Now as she has grown up
It all has started making sense
She fights her old ways of pleasing
And has started to think for her self
But as to her it may be the best choices
For others it may be the most pain some
She stands smiling and talking to others
Knowing she has inflicted pain
Even if that someone is brutal to her
She would feel all the same
The guilty and a little sad for other
Some people are just toxic
She never thought of hurting others
But this destiny
Made her do so
Now in everyone’s eye she is a Buzzer
Of pain inflicting demonic person
But I feel she is happy
She is happy within
To the world she could be anything
She is  learning to throw other’s perspective in trash
And accept her as herself
And not by others feelings
She has to first live for herself
To support all the other lives that matter to her
And she knows
People who truly love her
Will always be by her side as she change
People might get hurt
But now it’s not her business to mind
Its just their cup of tea

Cause, you’ll not always be a good character in everyone’s story

When we’ve started to grow?

Someone has rightly said

Human mind is a sieve

It does not retains

Little by little, piece by piece

We all have lost some memories

What we felt as kid back then?

How we ‘joyed on the Victory game

How coming back home from school was so easy

How we left all our worries

To the one holding our hands all our life

When we grew up? How it all started?

When we took our decisions on our own?

When we started to find rights and wrong?

Or when we learned to take the responsibility on self

Starting to compete in the race?

Or when other’s opinion started feeling trash

When did that hand faltered, we hadn’t had sight?

That was always guiding us for light

And now all the memories come in a flash of light

All the sweet and bitter

All the fights and tears

Time flying images scrawling inside

Moments persisted, never did die

Frail hands, beating heart, soul and body, mind full of love

Never did leave, never did leave

The day you realized your responsibility

But there is always that child inside our hearts

Let it live

Coz in this atmosphere of unpleasant lives

There is no more stake on life

Live while you can and

Create memories, love and cherish the present

That’s when we grew up

Little by little

Piece by piece

We build up the castle of memories

Till then enjoy laying every brick

Because its always the journey you’d fall in love with

Goal is just a temporary, will get faded

The inequality

We live in an independent country today

Where we have the right of speech and thoughts

Where we can do what we want, see what we want , without hurting others

But still there prevails a mentality

Where things that boys do, cannot be done by girls

Yes , infact it is true. They cannot

Boys can get slipped under provocation

But girls should remain good and ignorant

Boys can text dirty things

But if a girl even receives some, she is to be accused

Boys can do whatever they feel like in the moment loosing senses they should have control on!

But girls, I pity on them. They should be loyal and understanding and be silent.

But then boys regret it too.

But every action has a reaction as said by Einstein

And regretion will only make things worse

After a thing is done, is done

And it cannot be reversed nor it can be amended

The thing which can be is us

Girls, be more liberal

Don’t fear to talk to someone when you know your intentions

You know you were pure , and I believe you will be

And boys, please start curing your dark sides

Coz every time you are over that bridge

Something in us girls destroys

And when it is destroyed

it is hard to recover.

Societal evils

You think that whistle would woo a girl
Standing in an alley
Alone in dark or under the empty skies?

Or in open day light ? In front of her work space?

You think that you would be too manly?
If you would harass her ?
You think you have rights to touch her?
Just because you are a man?

You could ask her name in drunken voice

Just because she works outside day and night?

Or if she is up late at night?

This gives you every right?
In this male dominant society
You are the king like the lion ?
So now could touch her in all the wrong places?

Destroying her dignity, her aspect of freedom she should enjoy

That doesn’t gives any pleasure to her
Just. DISGUST

And you on heavy doses of weed and greed
Could rape her soul and burn the body

If she lives , she tries to hide
If she lives then also she dies
Of the torture the society gives
From the eyes they see her

If she dies, we die somewhere
Of the morality we claim,we loose somewhere

Parents give advices
Come early , and what not’S to do list
Why ?

Just because they or their mentality can’t change?

So follow them and keep your mouth shut
Because these men cannot satisfy their sexual needs on their own
They need to enforce it on other

So you keep quiet, girl!
Carry a paper spray
Cover your mouth
Come early
Wear cloth at every inch of your skin

If you get raped even then ..

May be the parents will understand
Rather than restricting the way girl carries herself

If people’s mentality changes ,then it’ll be a better place to live

Not, disregarding
We have BETTER MEN

our fathers,brothers ,boyfriends,husbands,uncles etc who we trust

But this nation has to understand
Don’t stop person
Stop that evil mentality
That leads to harrassments

20 ‘tables turned’

Life’s like lightening bolt

Every thing’s calm then suddenly warm

I was younger and careless

Waited for my pals to play

Now I go away from them

Coz they don’t and I won’t take a shit from them

When did the 20 tables turned?

I was just waiting for something vague

But precise are a few , who’ll be your side

And in the storm you know they’ll be at your side

It’s okay to feel alone sometimes

To miss people who were there

But it’s ok you’ll be strong

Stronger than ever you were

Cause you have been fighting your inner self for long

From the moment you started the race of growing up

You’ve fallen then stood up like a flower

Soft and gentle but can break the thread

You have learned lessons and more on the way

Till its time to turn the 20 tables back .

Empty river

There’s an empty river

At the east of the a village

People come and find

The calm in the silence

Of the river that once flowed

With all the gushing sounds it produced

The nature around nourished

Birds and animals found a source

And human find a destruction

A beautiful blue color it was

Turned in black and brown of the soil

An empty river of our faith

Of human kind

Beautifully silent

And

Magically depleting.

Change

Few years have passed by

I have changed the way I was before

I was more stupid and extrovert

I relied on everyone and believing they said truth

I had let my guards down for everyone who came thru

They knew me as as if I was an open book

Come and go whenever they want

And leave me when I’m alone

I felt this urge to separate myself

From the very beginning of the phase

And now that I’m all along with the one

I want

And open up to

I’m content to the level

My brim is full

Need no one to hear my thoughts

No feelings of despair and lone

Need no one to laugh on my silly jokes

Nor to share my food day-night along

When he is

I need no other than just us

And I realised how beautiful it was

To be just a little for show

Not every one knows what worth you owe

No one needs your life, your thoughts

Your illogical philosophy or snore

Its just the people who really care

So I just let my mouth shut, doors closed

To every one I meet from now on

When my beautiful life is in my mind

I need no one just us to assure

I need no one just us to be sure

I may not be the best, but not be the worst I know

I’ll try my best to be what you want

I know the failed attempts

Of filling someone’s expectation

I have failed my own

But who is perfect?

I have flaws of my own

I’ll walk this road with you

Will you count me in?

May be I’ll change a little more

May be you’ll change a little more

But we’ll figure out the rest in the time being?

Because I really don’t need the bullshit of crowd out there

Who are just temporary people and fake to adhere

I need the real people to stay

And he is one of the gem I got lucky to get

Of the priceless pearl from the deepest trench

Suffered high tides and low

Gone through the storm and withered blow

But still strong as the man I know till date

Patience, persistent and determined

A soul – stirred inside

He is my man

I need no one, just us to get.

Yes, I have changed

Khwab aise bhi

Khwabo ka ye parinda

Udte Udte kahi dur nikl jata h

Zindagi toh nhi dekhi isne puri

Lekin Khwabo ka parinda asman chumta h

Tumhare mere sapne dekhta h

Pyar bhare apne, dekhta h

Kbhi sunheri chidiya jaise udna chahta h

Dur gagan me, sabse alag

Na kisi ki dhun

Na kisi ki sudh

Bas apna manmauji rah dikhaye

Toh kbi yhi iss dooniya me

Tumhare khwab sajae

kbhi tumhari sabhi mushkilo ki

Marham bnna chahe

Khwab aise bhi h

Ki jite jite zindagi

Yuhi na guzar jae

Kuch apne liye,

Toh kuch auro k liye krke jae

Kuch maa baap k liye,

Toh kuch iss dharti k liye kr jae

Khwab aise bhi h

Ki bada sa bangla ho

Aish-o-aram ho

Par duniya ka shor-gul na ho

Patto ki lehlaha-at

Aur chidiyo ki chehchahat ho

Ek chota bagicha ho

Aur kai saare phool ho

Khwab aise bhi h

Ki chahe duniya kuch bhi kr jae

Iss bheed bhari zindagi me

Tera haath

Mere ghar ki maujudgi bayan kre.

Apne ghr ko bayan kre

Sare dar aur kathinai aan de

Pakd majboot rakh galib

Jado se juda ye saath

Tere haath me

Mera haath.

Ye ankh jb dhundlae

Jb ye kan na sunn pae

Toh vo tera sparsh hi bn jae.

Koi aur arzoo nhi

Koi aur khawb nhi

Khwab aise bhi h

Khwab aise bhi h

-Poojan

Songs and memories

I was walking on my own
Listening to songs on the play list
I once arranged
A song came up and flooded my mind
With memories of you by my side
In the crowd of people we were holding hands
We didn’t care around much
It was so lucky day
My newest favourite song was being played
By the band on the stage
I was screaming and singing
Swinging your hand fast and straight
Your roomie back then
Took our video
It is such a sweet memory
To behold
Right now I’m on my own
Waiting for you
( खड़ा हूँ आज भी वहीं )
To come along
And relive the moment
(के तेरा इंतज़ार है
कैसी है ये बेबसी
ये कैसी दिल की प्यास है
छू लो जो मुझे तुम कभी
खो ना जाऊं मैं रात दिन
नज़रों में तुम हो बसे
कह दो जो तुम एक बार
मेरे हो बस तुम मेरे
नज़रों में तुम हो बसे)